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Things to remember

February 22, 2010

-The way Peter coos in his sleep with each exhale.
-The way his big eyes stare at me while he is nursing
-How jealous I can be of a pacifier
-His smiles and laughs of contentment after falling asleep while nursing. He just seems to happy and at peace.
Peter woke up at about 1 am this morning, terribly congested, so we sat in the bathroom for the next hour just inhaling steam and nursing on and off.
I can’t believe how much I am willing to do for this little guy. I hate getting up in the middle of the night, but I actually treasure those midnight excursions with him. I haven’t gotten more than 3 straight hours of sleep since he was born, and I’m finding that’s enough. I actually don’t want him to sleep through the night. Sometimes I’m the first one up at his usual wakening times to make sure he doesn’t forget.
I’m so nervous about returning to work. Will I enjoy actually being able to work with two complete sets of hands? To be able to eat lunch without inadvertently using Peter as a catch tray? To spend an few precious hours (aka the drive there and back) alone with my wonderful husband? Or will it be a constant ache and longing for my baby? I want to find out, and yet I don’t want to…

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